A place to find Hope

Category: forgiveness (Page 1 of 3)

He Who Angers You Will Control You

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I had a week with heavy exercise. It has paid off. I lost a few pounds this week, and my legs feel stronger. I still have another day of exercise today. Then I will crash for the weekend.

I am sharing another excerpt today from my first book, Signs of Hope: Ways to Survive in and Unfriendly World. It received a national award.

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Chapter 3

He Who Angers You Controls You

But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother

will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother,

“Raca” [a term of contempt], is answerable to the Sanhedrin

[body of authorities]. But anyone who says,

“You fool!” will be in danger of the fire of hell.

Matthew 5:22

I have “a short fuse.” I can be easily offended and strike back with anger. As the years have gone by I realize that anger doesn’t solve anything. It only raises my blood pressure, and allows the other person to win. They get what they want. They got me frustrated and not thinking clearly.

I have finally gotten smarter and have learned to control my feelings to the point where I still may be upset about what has happened, but I don’t let it cause me to verbally strike out toward the other person. I don’t “count to ten.” I turn to God to give me strength to overcome my own feelings and think about the consequences for me if I fail in my quest to help others with their anger. I also ask God to help me have a calm spirit, and an understanding heart. I’m not being a good example to my children—or anyone else—if I don’t.

The following story makes the point about anger very clearly. Got a hammer?

There was a little boy with a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him to hammer a nail into the back fence every time he lost control. The first day the boy drove 37 nails into the fence. Then he gradually discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally, the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. His father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father led his son to the fence. “You have done well, but look at the holes in the fence,” he said. “When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like the nail holes. You can put a knife in a person and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say ‘I’m sorry,’ the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.”

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.

Psalm 37:7

A fool shows his annoyance [temper] at once,

but a prudent man overlooks an insult.

Proverbs 12:16

In your anger do not sin:

Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.

Ephesians 4:26

Further Adventures

How do you deal with anger? Do you have loved ones who can’t control their feelings some times? I have been a victim of losing my temper sometimes. I can’t put a bunch of nails in my fence out of anger because Charlotte would want me be put in a safe place so I wouldn’t be harmful to anyone—or the fence—again.

But think about this story each time you get angry. Tell it to your loved ones when they get upset. This is an easy story to remember. It is very short, but its impact could be tremendous.

Something to Ponder

Isn’t it funny that when we say kind words to someone they say kind words back?

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So how is your time on this earth going? Have you had a heated exchange with someone? Do you feel badly?

FEAR NOT!!

God is there with you and He will guide you on to how to reconcile with that person. To ask for forgiveness, or to forgive does wonders.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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Mary Did You Know?

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I sat and thought about Mary, mother of Jesus. What a task she was asked to do.

Most scholars think she was between 12-14 years old. They allowed men to have very young wives.

Mary met Joseph and they traveled together.

Suddenly, Mary was pregnant. She was only engaged and not married. I wonder what Joseph thought. “Should I quietly leave mary?” An angel came to him and said, “Fear not!” Mary will conceive the child of God.” Joseph understood, and stayed with Mary.

Mary was very scared and asked why she was chosen. Another angel came to her and told her, ” You will be the mother of God’s son. Call Him Jesus.”

So they went to Bethlehem and gave birth to Jesus. They had to stay in a dirty barn with many animals in it. Mary wrapped Jesus in swaddling clothes.

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This is where I really started wondering when I read this in the Bible. What did Mary know about this little child of hers? I found a song that covers it real well, and I am going to share it with you:

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Mary Did You Know?

Words by Mark Lowry

Mary, did you know that your baby boy would one day walk on water?

Mary, did you know your baby boy would save our sons and daughters?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy has come to make new; this child that you delivered will soon deliver you?

Mary, did you know that you baby boy will give sight to a blind man?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy would calm a storm with His hand?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy has walked where angels trod?

Mary, did you know that when you kiss your little baby boy, you are kissing the face of God?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy is Lord of all creation?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy will rule all the nations?

Mary, did you know that your baby boy was Heaven’s perfect lamb?

Mary, did you know that the sleeping child you are holding is the great, the Great I Am?

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That cleared everything up for me. Jesus is the son of God, and Mary is His mother.

Be blessed knowing that Jesus has the perfect CHRISTmas present for you. Eternal life.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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Why Do We Pray? Does it Really Work?

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We are told by our leaders in the church that we must pray. We must seek help from God. However, does it really work? God says yes. Matthew 18:20 says, “For where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them?

God hears our prayers, and He answers them in His own way. It says also in the Bible, to pray without ceasing. We should be talking to God every day.

Prayer unleashes God’s power. It changes us, and it changes the way we look at circumstances.

When we pray it resets the heart, and eliminates the horrible sounds around us.

How the world would change, if we all prayed as if we believed the prayers would all be answered.

Instead of criticizing, we should pray. Instead of protesting, we should pray.

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Take inventory on your prayer life. There is the need for prayer more than ever. Take time each day to pray for:

  1. Our country.
  2. Our national and local governments.
  3. For you own family.

If we ALL prayed every day, what a difference it would make in the world around us.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…..never, ever, give up!

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Being Gracious to Those Around us Should be a Priority

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I can’t help but grieve for the Gold Star families that saw the 13 heroes come from the war in Afghanistan.

They were very upset and furious as to how the things turn out with evacuations. It shouldn’t have happened that way.

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Got a pleasant surprise yesterday in the mail from a friend. We received a box from Harry and David’s full of goodies. I am eating the popcorn now as I type. She is a very gracious lady and friend.

This is what we need more of in our world. Gracious people who are reaching out to others. What a difference that would make.

God is very gracious as well. He sent His only Son down to earth to take care of all of our sins. we have eternal life, by God’s graciousness.

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Have you been gracious to those around you? Have you made a phone call to that friend who lost their spouse recently? Have you help volunteer for a worth while charity? Do you reach out to your own loved ones, often?

Think about that. Do you need to take an inventory of your life to see if you are gracious enough?

Try to concentrate about reach out to everyone around you. The world would be a different place if we all did.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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The So Called Movements Are Corrupting the Minds of People

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I have been learning about what justice is through my church. It has been a theme for several weeks.

The Pastor’s definition was : Loving what is good and hating what is evil.

Makes sense to me.

One thing we need to remember is that God’s purpose for justice differs from OUR pursuit of justice.

His purpose for justice is purification and restoration. We get that in one place. It is on the cross.

When we try to take on the world alone without Jesus we tend to be corrupted. It can catch us when we are unaware. The Black lives matter movement, and the anti everything groups darken our view of what is right and wrong.

One thing we must never forget is that everyone needs compassion and forgiveness. Even the anti groups.

Never let the dark side sway you into thinking in negative ways.

Take courage; hold on, and be strong.

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If you are getting caught up in the turmoil of the rioting, and people attacking the government, stop now and know that God is in charge. He knows what is going on, and He will correct everything when he is ready.

As for you and I. We need to pray for God’s guidence, and be open to His suggestions. Life would much more livable if we let God take charge of our lives.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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We Often Get Angry and say Something we Regret

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Just got home from an all day trip to the Oregon Coast. It is a trip that wears me down quickly. Two hours riding in a car each way. Then we went shopping at Costco. and that did me in pretty good. Could hardly walk when I got home and unloaded the car. I also took out the garbage.

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Enough whining from me. I have been sporadic on doing my posts, because of still recuperating from my surgery. It has taken forever to get even close to 100%

Hey wait…I am whining again…sorry!!

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My church service online from last Sunday was excellent. I am going to share some thoughts from that service.

The theme was “Don’t get caught up in the moment.”

We sometimes are easily upset and even angry with someone, and say things we later wish we hadn’t said.

I know I have been there. However, I am a guy that realizes my mistake and goes back to the person and apologize. There have been some of those times when they wouldn’t accept my apology,

At that point we need to move on and not dwell on the problem. If we do the other person has won.

We need to realize that we can get swept up in the currents of anger, jealousy, envy, hatred, etc. All those will lead to us drowning in the current.

Don’t drown in your own self pity. I used to have some great pity parties, but no one ever came.

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Often because of the misunderstandings and hurts, we feel powerless, we lose hope. God gives hope to the hopeless. He makes the impossible possible. He brings power to the powerless, and life to that which was dead.

So face each day with hope, and don’t get caught up in the moment.

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Another thing learned from church lasy Sunday:

  1. Let God take the glory. I have really concentrated on saying God did this and that for me. It wasn’t me it was His graciousness.
  2. Never add of subtract from God’s word. So many so called Christians take out of context what they want from a verse in the Bible to fit their own personal beliefs and not Gods.

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How is the world flowing for you? Is it a little overwhelming? Do the days drag on, because you are lost and in mental pain?

Turn to God. He has the world’s biggest shoulders. I can’t imagine trying to face this planet without Him in my life.

Pray to Him about your hurts, and pains. Ask Him to relieve your guilt. Ask Him to give you peace, and love.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all….never, ever, give up!

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Failure Shouldn’t be Anything Bad in Our Lives, Move on

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The election is behind us, and we have a new president. I did not vote for him, but my prayers are with him each day.

President Biden is in a big hurry to wipe out everything the President Trump accomplished. On his first day he signed over 25 executive orders to change many things President Trump had done.

We will have to wait and see how the people respond to all this change.

There were massive rioting on inauguration day in Seattle, and Portland, Oregon. President Biden has his hands full.

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Have you every failed? Did you attempt something and it all went south? You certainly are not alone. Here is a quote by arguably the greatest basketball player of all time.

” I’ve missed over 9,000 shots in my career. I lost lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I failed over and over in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Michael Jordan.

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Her is an example of failure in the Bible. Peter, one of Jesus’ closest friends failed.

He told Jesus He would never betray him. Jesus, said, “This very night before the rooster crows you will deny me three times. Peter declared, “Even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you, and all the disciples said the same. Peter then denied knowing Jesus three times. Later, after the rooster crowed, Peter remembered what he had said and he wept bitterly.

Many people today point to Peter as an example of what not to do, such as, speaking before you think, having little faith, being impulsive, and shrinking back denying things.

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In our own lives this is what we need to do:

Admit it

Be open and admit when you fail. Trying to hide sin doesn’t work. God already knows what you have done.

Forget it

Once you have admitted it let it go. Stop thinking about it in your mind. God doesn’t give you a list of things He has forgive you for so neither should you.

Get Back in it

Once you are forgiven it is over. Don’t waste any time. Get back in the game! God wants you to live fully, without being weighed down by shame and guilt. Use your failure to fuel your future success. God has too much to accomplish through you to be burdened by past failures.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never foraken,

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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How Do We React to Someone Who Had done something Wrong to Us?

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Well…The inauguration is over and there was very little problems. That is a very good sign at the moment. However, we have to ask, “What is next?”

Such a divided nation. Split right down the middle. This causes lots of turmoil, and hardships. We have to let God be in charge, and hope He will get our country to where He wants it.

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What would you do? Coming face-to-face with someone who has caused you so much pain, how would you act? What would you decide in that moment? And maybe the more important question is to discover, is why?

We find an example of this type of situation in the Bible. The story of Joseph.

Genesis 50…

2 This is the account of Jacob and his family. When Joseph was seventeen years
old, he often tended his father’s flocks. He worked for his half brothers, the sons
of his father’s wives Bilhah and Zilpah. But Joseph reported to his father some of
the bad things his brothers were doing.
3 Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other children because Joseph had been born to him in his old age. So one day Jacob had a special gift made for Joseph—a beautiful robe. 4 But his brothers hated Joseph because their father loved him more than the rest of them. They couldn’t say a kind word to him.

1) Joseph was sold into slavery by his own brothers, who decided to profit off of him, rather than kill him.
2) Thrown into prison, after being falsely accused of attempted rape because he refused to sleep with his master’s wife. 3) For two years, alone and forgotten in prison by the man he witnessed to. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like a rough life. For anyone, this would give them ample reasons to turn to anything but God—to give themselves over to bitterness and anger—to turn inward—to turn to self-pity—or have a legitimate cry for JUSTICE and VENGEANCE! ALL THAT TIME IN PRISON TO STEW OVER THE WRONGS THAT HAD BEEN DONE!

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Well, here is what happened next…

The brothers had come to Egypt because their families were starving and were asking for mercy. They didn’t recognize Joseph and bowed down before him seeking help. Then Joseph broke down and started weeping. He said,

3 “I am Joseph!” he said to his brothers. “Is my father still alive?” But his brothers
were speechless! They were stunned to realize that Joseph was standing there in
front of them. 4 “Please, come closer,” he said to them. So they came closer. And
he said again, “I am Joseph, your brother, whom you sold into slavery in
Egypt. 5 But don’t be upset, and don’t be angry with yourselves for selling me to
this place. It was God who sent me here ahead of you to preserve your lives. 6 This
famine that has ravaged the land for two years will last five more years, and there
will be neither plowing nor harvesting. 7 God has sent me ahead of you to keep
you and your families alive and to preserve many survivors. 8 So it was God who
sent me here, not you! And he is the one who made me an adviser to Pharaoh—the
manager of his entire palace and the governor of all Egypt.

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So how would you have handled this? What would you have done?

Can you forgive someone that had done so much wrong to you? Will you forget the past and open your arms to this person, or persons?

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I have to admit it would be very hard for me, but I would do it. We must think of Jesus hanging on the cross and had the complete right to be angry, bitter, and want revenge, but He said, Father, forgive them for the do not know what they are doing.

He was being killed and He ask God to forgive them!!

With that always stuck in my mind, I overcome any bitterness I may have and forgive.

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Think about this in the future. Think, what would Jesus do?

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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Does God Really Keep All of His Promises to us?

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I am reading about all the suspended accounts on Twitter and Facebook. It is really sounding like “Big brother,” is saying only write what I like.

The people are furious and moving on to other social networks. I do not blame them for one second. This is sounding more like a few controlling many.

I am on Facebook and Twitter. I haven’t said anything “awful” enough to be banned yet. I try to be positive as much as I can, but there are times when a person posts something that I can’t let slide.

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Have you had broken promises invade your heart? Those you expected to happen and then they didn’t? We have all had that embrace us and knock us down.

I got to thinking about that. I has someone ask me, “Does God really keep His promises. So I did some digging in the Bible and one glaring example happened to be Abraham.

First let me give some back history on Abraham. He wasn’t a follower of God. As a matter of fact his whole family worshipped other gods. He was a pagan. We see this happen through out the Bible where God selects someone who wasn’t always a wonderful person:

Paul

Peter

David

OK…I digress.

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Abraham wasn’t a bright star on God’s list at the time, but God chose Him to populate the world.

Then you see that God made Abraham wait, and wait, and wait, Before he could have his first son born from his wife. She was 90 when Isaac was born!!!

Abraham kept challenging God to follow through with his promises. God kept telling him it isn’t time yet.

Even after Isaac was born God tested Abraham by telling him to sacrifice Isaac. God of course stopped Abraham by provided a lamb for the sacrifice.

God kept telling Abraham he would keep His promises. He was just doing His promises on His time and not Abraham’s time.

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Do you wonder if God will keep His promises to you? Of course He will. It is just like Abraham. It will be on God’s timing not yours.

I trust God to guide me through this not so friendly world. He knows what is best for me. He cares for me and will do what I need. We just have to be patient.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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It’s Time to Set Goals for 2021 Choose Wisely

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It is now 2021. 2020 is gone. It is in the past. Let’s move on. Enjoy the new beginning. Enjoy the new hope.

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Today is a big day for football fans. You could watch bowl games all day. I have picked my favorite to win it all. Clemson has a tremendous quarterback, and they look pretty good.

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What is your goals for the new year? I suggest you do not do resolutions. They are too easy to break. You goals should be realistic and reachable.

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Here is my goals for 2021:

Finish my new book, Signs of Hope for the Military: In and Out of the Trenches of Life.

I have been spending over three years on this book. So much research and phone calling. I want this to be just what our military needs to win their inner battles.

If you want to know about the book, go to www.dougbolton.com. I have been sharing excerpts there.

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The next goal is to be healthy. I have been having issues, and I am tired of being tired. Need to find the ways to be stronger, and healthier.

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Then I want to be able to go where ever I want, when ever I want to. This pandemic has caused me to be on lock down since last March.

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Of course, I want to be closer to God. He is my heavenly Father. I need to read the Bible more. Pray more, and do more to glorify His name.

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I have many more goals in my head, but they can be added as I finish some of the others. Do not over load your goals.

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How about you? Have you thought of the new year and what you have for goals? Make a list right now. Most important goals first. Put them up somewhere to remind you to be doing them.

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God has plans for you. He will reveal those to you when He feels it is the right time. Listen to Him. Do not ignore His instructions. He wants the best for you.

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Remember:

You are never alone.

You are never forsaken.

You are never unloved.

And above all…never, ever, give up!

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+If you like what you see, please subscribe at the top of this page where it says, “subscribe.” When you do, all future posts will come directly to your inbox. Also, if you know some else who could benefit from this site, please let them know about it.

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